Best Plaid Lans....

Ever make a huge decision, a live-changing one, and then five minutes later have life kick you in the...well, you know, preventing you from going forward? I woke up at 6, spent two hours thinking, contemplating, debating and deciding. I scheduled, prepared, and was all set. And just moments before the big ta-da moment, life kicked me.

Not a permanent kick, not a big life-changing thing of its own (as sometimes happens) but enough to make me stop and say "not today" because going forward right now would just be the most selfish and snotty thing I've ever done.

Here's the deal -- a huge part of the big decision was to stop running away from conflict. To actually stand up and say "I'm mad as hell and won't take it anymore." I was so proud of myself this morning for reaching that point. And I feel like a stuck record now, unable to move forward but not actually moving back (yet).

We'll see what happens...hopefully I'll find a way to get the courage up and make my stand once this momentary set-back is over. If in real life I actually was Azune, there'd be no problem with thinking I could do this....but that's the funny thing about the character you play in a game and your real persona, they don't always have to match.